Myers-Briggs defines someone with a preference to Introversion as:
“A person who likes getting energy from dealing with ideas, pictures, memories and reactions that are inside their heads, their inner worlds. They prefer doing things alone, or with one or two other people they feel comfortable with. They take the time to reflect so they have a clear idea of what they’ll be doing when they decide to act. Ideas are almost a solid thing for an introvert. Sometimes they like the idea of something better than the real thing.”
Notice that the definition doesn’t say anything about being shy, or anti-social, or a loner, or desiring to avoid leadership or attention. It’s all about energy. For an introvert, dealing with people consumes energy, where time alone restores it.
I’m an introvert – big time. When taking Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, I always show a very strong preference to introversion. At the same time, I like to lead and manage teams. This can lead to a dilemma, as after all, teams are full of those energy draining people… The following are some of the things I’ve learned as an introverted leader that help keep me sane!
Manage Your Calendar - When I first became a manager, I decided I wanted to be extra diligent on providing 1x1 time with my team. I had a relatively large team of direct reports located throughout the world. I wanted to do weekly 1x1’s with each employee and dedicated a full day to it each week. I’d start at 7:00AM with phone calls to employees in Europe, spend the day talking with folks face-to-face in the office, then end up back on the phone with my team in Asia during my early evening.
By about noon each day, I was done. I’d “used all of my words” as my wife described it. The quality of my attention and interaction went downhill quickly. What started as good intentions – setting up dedicated time to directly interact with my team each week and build better relationships – ended up delivering exactly the opposite results. The employees I interacted with later in the day got an inattentive, distracted and an overall bad experience.
The lesson I learned from this is that calendar management is extremely important. Know yourself and your energy levels throughout the day, and schedule appropriately. Do you run out of patience after about 4 hours of 1x1 time? If so, then don’t schedule a full day of 1x1’s. Do you have an extreme extrovert on your team who’s happy to lead the conversation? Schedule them towards the end of your day. Do you have a massively important presentation to your CEO at the end of the day? Don’t spend your mornings meeting with people who consume a lot of your energy…
This is not specific to work interactions, either. When I’ve “used all my words” at work, I’m not very interactive at home. If you know you have an important family event, make sure you’re factoring that into your work schedule so that you have the appropriate levels of energy and attention available for the really important people in your life.
Protect Your Outlets - Outlets are activities you use to reset and recharge your energy levels. It may be quiet time reading, or browsing the internet, or exercising. Know what your outlets are and ensure you structure your time in a way that protects them. This doesn’t mean you should plan 3 hours off to play golf at lunch each day, but outlets do have a high return on investment. If spending an hour exercising at lunch will make you twice as productive for the rest of the afternoon, then it is well worth blocking that time on your calendar. Don’t be shy about making time for something that will make you better.
Snacks! - What happens when you take an introvert, stick him in a room full of people, and then let him go 4 or 5 hours without food? Speaking from personal experience, absolutely nothing good!
You can’t ignore the physical aspect of your energy levels. For me, being hungry with low blood sugar has exactly the same impact on my personality as being exhausted from a long day of dealing with people. Add the two together and you’ve got a recipe for disaster. The good news is that this is easy to solve. Keep healthy snacks close by and eat before you’re super hungry. This keeps my physical energy levels stable, and allows me to better manage emotional energy needs.
Just Deal With It - It’s important to remember that introversion is a preference, not a resolute style. If you want to lead and manage, there are times you’ll have to move away from your preferred working style and just deal with it.
Don’t use introversion as an excuse to not interact. If you’ve had a long day, getting ready to walk out the door and head to your recharge zone, and an employee comes to you with a critical need – stop, focus the energy you have, and give them the attention and focus they deserve. That’s part of being an effective leader – putting aside your own desires in order to help the team.
The same holds true outside of work. Having a busy day at work is not an excuse to ignore your kids, spouse, family or friends. Realize that it is a preference and respect the people you’re interacting with.
You need to be authentic with yourself, too, though. If dealing with people truly stresses you out, then a career in people management is probably not going to be something that you’re going to be good at. Understand the difference between preference and ability, and make sure you’re pursuing a path you can be successful at.
These are some of the key things that have helped me as an introvert. I’d love to hear what others are doing!
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