Every morning, 58-year-old Maria- Louise Warne reclines topless on her sun lounger in the pretty garden of her home in rural southwest France. Usually she’s looking, by her own appraisal, nothing short of breathtaking in one of her numerous designer two-pieces, that she believes complements her perfectly honed 36-26-36 hourglass figure. However, while her youthful looks and age-defying bikini body may garner plenty of admiration, the English language teacher claims that the neighbours are less supportive of her habits. Maria-Louise, who is originally from Bovey Tracey, Devon, said they’re, ‘incandescent that I prefer to get an all-over tan in my own garden,’ and admits that she’s seen as an ‘outrageous exhibitionist’.
But she puts their behaviour down to jealousy. ‘On a good day I know I look 20 years younger and can easily pass for 38,’ she said. ‘My breasts haven’t dropped, I don’t have a muffin top and there isn’t an ounce of spare flesh on me. It drives most women mad.’ According to Maria-Louise, women once loved being in her company – but only when she was by her own estimation, overweight. ‘When I was married, 14 stone and a size 18 during my late-30s and 40s I had lots of female friends. ‘But when I lost my husband and shed the weight, I suddenly found my girlfriends no longer wanted to know me either.’
During her teenage years she had, she now recognises, her first taste of the ugly side of the sisterhood. An only child, she was also something of a local beauty. Indeed when she celebrated her 15th birthday, she discovered that she was ‘officially prettier’ than her peers: ‘I was photographed and written about in a newspaper. She said: ‘The piece was all about me being a local beauty. ‘While my deceased father was proud as punch, my late mother was so resentful and bitter about it that she didn’t speak to me for a month.’
During her 20s and early-30s Maria-Louise put her ‘good looks and bombshell figure’ to work in the sales industry. She won awards for her company, smashing through all of her targets. ‘I was able to have a BMW, buy a boat and go on far-flung holidays,’ she giggles, ‘I earned a fortune and I put that down to being easy on the eye.’ ‘I was on the road during the week visiting bored but rich and sophisticated married businessmen who were usually used to dealing with podgy men in suits. ‘No wonder they were falling over themselves to do business with me.
When their wives met me at social functions, they couldn’t stand me.’ The only flies in the ointment were potential female clients: ‘My boss stopped giving me sales appointments with women. I spoke well, was confident and attractive and I knew our products inside out,’ she said. ‘Yet women would refuse to buy them from me – they hated me on sight.’ Maria-Louise moved to France in 2002 with her then husband, but today she lives alone in a lively rural community. While she’s been married twice, she’s never had children of her own. She said: ‘My mum hated me so much and was so threatened by me, that I feared I’d compete with my female offspring too.
‘I couldn’t ever risk having a daughter. What if she was fat or ugly and was jealous of me too?’ Today Maria-Louise is 18 months away from her 60th birthday. Not only does she have zero cellulite, but she has never been under the surgeon’s knife and neither has she resorted to Botox or fillers.
She says that her looks and size 10 figure are simply down to a strict eating regime and a gruelling daily exercise routine that would give Gisele pause for thought. ‘I exercise for two hours each day. First I run 15 miles, then I walk my dogs for an hour. I have to buy new trainers every three months – I’m so fit and focused on running.
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